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I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin.
I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some
mid-level governmental functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to
give it away to crack addicts.
I'm not in touch with my feelings, and I like it that way!
I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer.
I believe it's called the Boy Scouts for a reason.
I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized.
I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac in New York or Los
Angeles, you should do it in English.
I don't use the excuse "it's for the children" as a shield for unpopular
opinions or actions.
I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July.
I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment
than working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the
bill to put you through 4-7 years of college, you haven't begun to be
enlightened.
I believe everyone has a right to pray to God.
I don't hate the rich and I can always help the poor.
I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time watching it or
arguing about it.
I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse
Jackson preaches. And where does he get his money. And why is he always
part of the problem and not the solution.
I also think they have the right to pull you over if you are breaking
the law, regardless of what race you are.
I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want
you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world
for the next four years.
I think if you are in the passing lane, and not passing, your license
should be revoked, and you should be forced to ride the bus until you
promise to never delay the rest of us again.
I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two
parents.
I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't
pretend they are a political statement.
I think Dr. Seuss was a genius.
I believe if she has her lips on your male organ, it is sex, and it is
sex for both of you. This even applies when you are President of the
United States.
I am neither angry nor disenfranchised, no matter how desperately the
mainstream media would like the world to believe otherwise.
If that makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American. If you
too are a BAD American please forward this to everyone you know. We
need our country back! I am a BAD American.
I am George Carlin.